Spiritual and relationship expert, teacher, counselor, advisor, speaker, and writer James Gray Robinson

Cheerleaders Vs. Critics

I was leading a group meditation the other night and afterwards the conversation turned to whether we are self-critics or self-cheerleaders. We all know the voice in our heads that always has something to say about whatever we are experiencing. When we are experiencing something that we like, that voice can be supportive and joyful. However, when we are experiencing something that we don’t like, many times that voice is critical and brutal.

We all know cheerleaders and we all know cheers. Our inner voice can cheer anytime we are getting what we want. When live is challenging and we are experiencing loss that voice can be depressing and beat ourselves up. So be proactive and select a cheer that you will use instead of the critical statements we seem to be so good at. “I’m the best”; “never quit”; “Thank you God”, “That’s alright, that’s ok, I’m going to be alright anyway” all are cheers that can keep you positive when you are experiencing what we don’t want.

An exercise that can get to the cause of the self-criticism is to listen very carefully when that voice is critical and identify whose voice that is. Who does it sound like? Who does it remind you of? You were not born with that voice, you were programmed by someone to be self-critical. Does the language seem familiar? Who does it feel like? Use all of your senses to identify who is living rent free in your head.

When you identify the voice, thank it for keeping you alive. That is its purpose; to make sure you don’t make the same mistakes twice. However, for many of us, it takes on a life of its own and focuses only on the negative aspects of your life. That limits us and causes a lot of stress. Who controls your mood and your mood, this voice in your head or your higher self? If you want to experience the unlimited abundance to which you are entitled, you have to get rid of that harsh voice that is so quick to judge. Let go of that judgment, let go of that voice. Keep saying a cheer to yourself and keep going. It will make all of the difference.