As you go through life, it’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking that getting older means slowing down, settling in, and sticking to what you know. My geriatrics doctor keeps asking me when I am going to slow down. But what if, instead of focusing on growing old, you made it your goal to keep growing in every way that matters?
How do you ignore the messages to grow old “gracefully”, the expectation that you must accept the passage of time as inevitable and unchangeable? What if you could shift your focus from simply growing old to something much more powerful? What if, instead of merely marking years, you commit to a lifelong journey of growth?
When you think about growing old, it’s often tied to a sense of slowing down, of settling into the rhythms that age brings. But growing, on the other hand, is vibrant and dynamic. Growing is about expanding your mind, your spirit, your experiences, and your capacity to learn new things, including unlearning and relearning, changing even very old neural pathways. It’s about embracing change and welcoming the unknown, although it may scare you. Just like most living things, you are meant to continuously expand.
Consider someone like Charles Darwin. He was 50 years old before he published On the Origin of the Species in 1859, one of the most lasting and influential works of our times. I’d also love to bring attention to some lesser-known individuals whose stories truly inspire me. Harriette Thompson was a cancer survivor who ran her first marathon at the age of 76, and at 91 years old completed her 15th marathon, becoming the second-oldest marathon runner in U.S history. Smoky Dawson, known as Australia’s first cowboy and a pioneer of Western music, became the oldest person (at 92!) to compose, record, and release a new album. And in 2014 Yuichoro Miura became the oldest person to reach the top of Mount Everest at age 80. These people didn’t see age as a barrier—they saw it as just another phase of life where they could continue to explore their interests and talents.
In your own life, there are plenty of ways to keep growing. You could take a class in something you’ve always been curious about, like photography or coding. If you love music, you might finally learn to play that instrument you always dreamed of playing. No one is saying you have to become an expert or even very “good” at what you choose, but don’t let that keep you from doing it! As the saying goes, “the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.” Even small steps, like reading a new book every month or trying a new podcast can help you keep expanding your horizons.
Mentoring is a great way to stay active and be of service to others. Our elderly population is a great resource to help both the young and old. Many people just want someone to talk to and feel supported. Get involved in mentoring however you can.
I think of all of the things I tried out after I left my law practice; from ranching to being a spiritual healer. I wasn’t Grayt* at any of them when I began, but I still dove in because I know that we’re either shrinking or expanding. After years of not doing what I wanted to do, I’m now choosing to have as many new experiences as possible.
Growth doesn’t just happen in your career or hobbies. It can also happen in your relationships and how you approach life’s challenges. Maybe you’ve always been shy about meeting new people—what if you made it a goal to start conversations with strangers? Or perhaps you’ve struggled with stress. Learning new ways to manage it, like through meditation or exercise, is a form of growth too.
The key is to keep pushing yourself, even when it’s uncomfortable. And it probably will be! As I’ll continue to remind you, our brains love familiarity, so you will have to override its sometimes-lackadaisical inclinations. Growing isn’t always easy, but it’s what keeps life interesting and fulfilling. Instead of letting your age dictate what you do, let your interests, passions, and goals guide you. Whether you’re 25 or 75, there’s always room to grow.
To grow, rather than grow old, means you don’t have to be bound by the limitations that society often places on aging. You can reinvent yourself at any stage, pursuing new passions, learning new skills, and deepening your understanding of the world around you. Your growth isn’t confined to the physical; it stretches into your emotional, intellectual, and spiritual dimensions as well. I think about musicians like the Rolling Stones, Bill Withers, and Dolly Parton. Imagine how much we would have missed out on if they had decided to move quietly into “old age”. They made the same decisions you can make: to continue to move boldly into every new chapter of your life.
Consider how you spend your time. Are you operating largely on autopilot, or are you actively seeking out opportunities to learn and evolve? Growing is about staying curious, questioning the status quo, and refusing to let complacency take root.
Growth requires courage! It demands that you step out of your comfort zone and face challenges head-on. It’s not always easy, but the rewards are immeasurable. When you choose to grow instead of just growing old, you find that life doesn’t simply pass you by; you are an active participant, constantly shaping and reshaping your path. Research used to claim that the brain becomes relatively fixed later in life, but we now know that we can utilize the power of our neuroplasticity, and our ability to change, at any age.
Continuously learning new things keeps you young by engaging your mind, sparking curiosity, and fostering a sense of purpose. When you learn something new, your brain forms new connections and new neural pathways which helps maintain cognitive function and mental agility as you age. This mental stimulation can slow down the cognitive decline often associated with aging, keeping your mind sharp and responsive.
Learning also brings a sense of excitement and curiosity, which are often associated with youth. When you dive into a new subject or skill, you’re opening yourself up to new possibilities and perspectives, much like a young person discovering the world for the first time. This fresh outlook can make life feel more vibrant and less routine, preventing the stagnation that can come with aging.
Learning fosters adaptability and resilience, which are both essential tools for expansion. As you encounter new challenges and solutions, you become more flexible in your thinking and better equipped to handle changes in life. This adaptability is a key trait often seen in younger people, who are more likely to embrace change and uncertainty. But it can be accessed at any age!
Think about your physical body. When movement is restricted, it undergoes several physiological and structural changes that can negatively impact overall health and well-being. When muscles aren’t used consistently, they begin to atrophy, or shrink in size. Muscle fibers become smaller and decrease in muscle strength and endurance.
This process reminds us that: WE ARE MEANT TO KEEP MOVING!!
As you continue your journey, remember that how you grow is up to you. It’s in the books you read, the conversations you have, the people you meet, and the experiences you seek out. It’s in how you respond to life’s endless ups and downs and how you celebrate it all. By committing to growth, you ensure that your spirit remains youthful and vibrant, no matter how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
So, don’t “grow old”! I just turned 71 and feel like these are some of the best years of my life. Continuous learning keeps me (and you!) mentally sharp, curious, adaptable, and socially connected—all qualities that contribute to a youthful outlook on life, regardless of age. I allow myself to embrace the idea that I am never finished, that there’s always more to learn, more to see, and more to become. Most recently I have become an award winning author, moved into filmmaking, and was knighted by a royal order, all things that I was only dreaming about 10 years ago. By choosing to grow, I keep my heart and mind open, ensuring that life remains as exciting and fulfilling as it was when I was younger.
don’t believe the hype about aging. I don’t believe we used the word “grow” old haphazardly, as we are continuously growing. You get to make the choice every day: are you resigning yourself to “grow old” or are you committing to blooming wildly? I choose the latter for you, and I hope you do too.
The quantum fields can also help us to understand the process of expansion. I’m very proud of my new documentary, completed in my 70s, to deepen your understanding of the quantum world and how it can help you grow in all the ways you dream of. Check it out at: https://www.primevideo.com/detail/Beyond-Physical-Matter-Health-Healing-and-Longevity/0O4JWK33KCK7GHIKDUPH5XOK8S
*”Grayt” is not a spelling error. It is a philosophy and a way of being! It took me a long time to learn how to make my life truly Grayt; to give the best of myself, and to squeeze the most out of this wild experience of being human. I use this spelling to remind myself of the Graytness that exists inside of me and is here to express itself to the fullest, just as it is inside of you too.